My earliest memory is thinking she was the most beautiful woman. I would watch her put on her liquid eye liner and her lipstick…she had a specific way of doing it and always the tissue blot! I would ask to keep that lipstick kiss stamp.
One Christmas her friend gave her a green Kaftan dress. Mom cried when she opened it. She believed it to be too extravagant of a gift. When she wore it, she floated in the room. I remember wishing for the time I could wear the matching gold glittery sandals.
On my wedding day, Mom was stunning. She looked incredible. We talked her into the hat but she nailed it with her natural class and beauty!
Funny, the first memories of Mom should be about her beauty. I bet she had no idea how beautiful she really was. The thing is, her beauty was holistic. Her kindness and generousity was beautiful. Her unconditional love and devotion was beautiful. The way she made you feel when she lovingly brushed the hair from your face was beautiful.
Mom not only loved being a Mom, she was really good at it. Mom demanded respect straight up. Everyone knew how Mom expected you to behave without exception. People were happy to oblige. My friends chose my house as the place to hang out although there were more rules there than their own home. Mom was fare and giving. She had a way of making people feel special.
Mom’s greatest talent was being able to get ‘it’ all done, on time, without drama or complaint and always enjoy whatever it is she had been preparing for. She was the hostess of all hostesses.
Blessed with the greatest Mom, I was determined to be a great Mom too.
Although I studied about being a Mom, read all the books, took child development at university and babysat all through my teens. Nothing taught me mothering like Mom herself. Prior to delivering my first child, Mom would sooth my parenting insecurities with, “you just wait. You’ll see.” Mom was referencing the indescribable, truly no words suffice, love I felt for my babe when I first saw her. I was not prepared for that impact. It was the same for my second child. I was insecure about having enough love for two children. Mom lovingly assured me, “you just wait. You’ll see.” The mother child impact was just as strong when my son was born. Later I giggled at my ignorance. Mom was absolutely right. Mom’s have all the love they need a more for all their children.
Being a mom is one of my greatest accomplishments. For some reason, I always thought I would never have children. My pregnancies were unexpected and miraculous each time because of this belief. I loved being pregnant. Although each pregnancy was very different, it was spectacular to have a person grow inside of me. I documented every day in a journal. I read every day about the development of my unborn child. After each birth, the hollowness of my body would make me sad. If only, I could birth the way I could carry I may have had more children! (Easy to say now of course! Ha)
This Mother’s Day, I find myself feeling grateful. Both my children are healthy. My eldest, has grown into an intelligent, driven, talented, beautiful young adult. She is independent and full of passion. Her life is just beginning. My ‘baby’ is becoming a young man. At sixteen, his childhood is almost over. He warms my heart when I see his kindness and compassion. He is quiet and yet ever aware of his surroundings. He learns quickly and shows respect easily. He is growing by the second in his ever changing body.
In my Mom’s memory, I will continue to Mother these babes to the best of my ability…even when they resist. I am forever thankful to Mom for teaching me how to love and to be loved.
Today I remember all of the Moms who no longer have their babes and all the women who never became a mom when they so desperately wanted to be. To you women, know each time you smile, support, encourage, accept or share a kind word with any child…you are a Mom.
Happy Mother’s Day.